How to Coach Difficult Kids

Many adults and coaches consider kids difficult to coach, when
 maybe it’s you who’s being difficult.

So many coaches become frustrated when their team does not seem to be giving an all out effort.  This is most prevalent among kids 12 to 15 years old.  This age group is still trying to figure out if they want to continue to play and what else they might be missing outside of sports.  This is the most vital time for a coach to understand his or her athletes.

Communication is vital yet how you communicate may be more important. If you show your frustration and yell and scream or act disgusted with your team’s performance it may only verify for kids that this is not something they would like to continue to be involve with moving forward. 

What can you do when kids don’t give an effort of 100%?

Distractions in a kid’s life at this age can play a large role in the type of effort they bring to a game or practice.  Let’s be honest, sports are not their number one priority at this age.  Between today’s technology that allows them to interact with multiple friends at anytime of the day, school, their relationships with the opposite sex, and the fact that video games have changed the way they experience competition, you as a coach and parent are at a significant disadvantage when you attempt to motivate them.

The amount of effort extended by a kid at an athletic event can also be directly related to how contemporary the sports experience is in comparison to the fast pace of the remainder of their lives. In other words, if kids find practice boring, this age group will rebel by openly complaining, losing attention, or quitting.  Sports have unfortunately been presented and taught the same way for many decades.  The experience is neither contemporary nor exciting for a kid to be attracted to in comparison to other aspects of their lives. Practices and your coaching approach must be creative and capture your athletes’ attention in order to be effective.

This age is considered difficult for many of the reasons stated above, however it may very well be you who’s adding to this behavior.  If kids are bored, their minds and interest will stray.  If kids are continually driven to do something against their will, they’ll most likely be more likely to give less effort. If you use threats of taking things away (starting positions, or overall playing time) in order to get them to do something, they’ll certainly lose any type of passion they may have left, and they’ll quit. 

So how do you effectively coach this age group?

The following are four tips to become an effective coach for this vital age group of 12 to 15 year olds.

1. Poll your team. This is an age group that still needs to be coddled yet motivated to perform.  A good first step is to ask your athletes to write what they would like to accomplish as an individual player and team this season.  In addition ask them to describe what their overall athletic goals are for the future.  Be sure to let them know that this will be entirely confidential, and only you, the head coach will see their responses.  As a result you’ll be able to know what each of your athletes’ motivating factors are for participating rather than guessing or never having any initial information at your fingertips.
   
   
2. Improve your practices. As we mentioned, kids are accustomed to a fast paced lifestyle that is full of creative and contemporary experiences.  Remember kids most likely don’t want to be at practice to begin with, there are so many other things they would like to be doing other than going to a slow paced unorganized practice.  That’s right, I said unorganized.  A kid’s life is fast paced and involves a quick click of a mouse to keep their attention.  Now think about your practices.  Break your practices into 10 to 15 minute timed segments over no more than 90 minutes that focus on only two major things that you would like to accomplish each practice.  The first 5 minutes of each segment should only include a demonstration or explanation of what you would like to accomplish.  Be sure to pair every athlete off with someone of similar ability. The remaining 10 minutes should focus on repetitions that allow for every athlete to understand and experience what they have just observed.  This should be immediately followed by a 5 to 10 minute one on one or individual competition that self measures overall progress.
   
   
3. Incorporate free play. Yes, even at this age we need to freshen things up by incorporating other activities and sports.  If you want to keep their attention you should be prepared to surprise your athletes occasionally with alternative activities that are fun and keep them fresh athletically.  Activities such as Ultimate Frisbee, or a mini Olympics of events that focus on agility, balance, coordination, speed, etc. are creative ideas that change things up while continuing to develop them as athletes.
   
   
4. Keep individual scores during games. A great way to keep athletes motivated is to monitor their individual progress in games throughout the season.  (See “Keeping Track of the Real Score” on this site.) This allows a coach and athlete to accurately track where they are as they pursue their goals throughout the season. Engaging kids in their own progress and demonstrating that you care about them will enable you to better motivate them throughout an entire season.